NOT ME!

I’m trying something new for my blog, and hopefully it will provide you with a few laughs. If not, then at least it will help you waste some time while you could be doing something more constructive!

Recently, I have started following MANY other “mommy” blogs out there. Ryan sometimes thinks that I have lost my mind completely when I will burst out laughing (or crying) over something I am reading about complete strangers. Quite often though, these strangers could pass for my long lost relatives because we all share such similar stories!
McMama is a blogger that I have become addicted to, and one of the reasons is her “NOT ME! MONDAYS” posts. Let me take a few steps back for a moment before I explain her “game” and tell you a story…

My husband grew up as the youngest in a household of six boys. Being the baby, he apparently got away with anything and everything. This left such a mark on the other boys, that a large portion of Ryan’s brother Kyle’s wedding toast to us was devoted to this issue. He went into great detail describing how Ryan would do this or that to get into trouble, and then when caught he would simply say, “NOT ME!” Kyle also went on to very vividly demonstrate the little dance that Ryan would do behind his parent’s backs as one of the other boys took the punishment for his crimes. It was quite a funny speech/toast that I will never forget. ESPECIALLY BECAUSE TO THIS DAY MY HUSBAND STILL PLAYS THE “NOT ME” GAME! I’ve lost count of the number of times that I have asked “Who did this” or “What happened to that?” to hear Ryan answer (often from another room where he actually has no idea of what I am referring to) with the response of “Not me!”

So when I discovered McMama’s Not Me! Mondays, I had to find out more. To use her words exactly…

“Not Me! Monday was born out of a desire to admit some of our imperfections and reveal a few moments we'd rather forget. 

Why? Well, for one, because it's just plain fun to pretend that we really did not do the things that we actually so did do. And, two, because reading through great tales of other people's Not Me! Mondays each week is a great way to level the playing field. We're all human, we all take embarrassing shortcuts, and so we may as well show each other that we're all in good company!”

With that being said, this will be my first time participating in the Not Me! fun. I can’t guarantee that I will play along every week, but here we go for now…

I DID NOT stay up after midnight almost every night last week reading all 12 books of the Sisterhood Series by Fern Michaels. I also DID NOT drink Starbucks espressos by the pot (not the cup) because of this!

I DID NOT put Reagan to bed three nights in a row without a bath last week. I DID NOT ignore the fact that we have other bathrooms in the house and instead blamed it on the fact that the bathtub in her bathroom was leaking into the light fixture in the kitchen below and it took three days for the plumber to fix it. It certainly wouldn’t have been so that I would have more time to read the previously mentioned books!

My kitchen DID NOT remain dark because I was too lazy for three days after the plumbing problem was fixed to re-connect the now dry light fixture in the kitchen. I most certainly DID NOT use my dark kitchen as an excuse to go out to eat or to order in for those nights!

I DID NOT spend over half an hour getting Reagan’s hair perfectly curled and coiffed for her gymnastics class this week while only taking 5 minutes to brush my own hair and teeth.

I DID NOT, as of January 6, manage to have already broken my New Year’s Resolution to remember to take my vitamins everyday.

I DID NOT contemplate taking a double dose of vitamins on January 7 to make up for it.

I DID NOT phone and whine to my parents that they posted on their blog what my sister gave them for Christmas, but they didn’t say anything about what Ryan, Reagan & I gave them. That would have been something a two year old would have done! I also DID NOT complain that they put a picture of me on their blog where I looked horrible because I had been shoveling snow all day and I was gross and sweaty. Considering my appearance at Reagan’s gymnastics, who would care about a picture like that?! Not me! (PS… their blog is www.mytripjournal.com/skipandcindy if you want to follow along with them as they “Chase the Dream”)

I DID NOT scream at my computer while working on the upcoming Wedding Show because some idiot sent me a message three times asking the same question three different ways. “Hello dumb person… read your wedding show info pack to answer those questions yourself!”

And finally…
I DID NOT just show this post to my husband and tell him that I have no idea who would write such things about him or how in the world it ended up on my blog. I certainly wouldn’t do that. NOPE, NOT ME!!!!