Friday, April 25, 2008

I Love My Daughter

When we were getting in the car after gymnastics today, Reagan looked at me and said, "Mommy, I'm happy!" Then she gave me the biggest hug and kiss. I can't begin to describe to you in words the feeling of my heart swelling with love. It was the same as the moment when Dr. Abrahams first placed her in my arms the day she was born. There have been many of those moments over the last two years... daily dozens it seems. I never knew how much she would change my life. I have learned things about myself that I never realized before. I always thought that IF I ever had kids, I would have just one. I love being a mother so much now that I think I could have ten. I do realize the cost to raise children now-a-days, so we will probably keep it down to just two or three! Maybe four if I can convince Ryan!!! Yes, we have plans for more children in the future, but I am enjoying Reagan way too much right now to share her. It may sound crazy to you, but my daughter is my best friend. I can hope and dream that the relationship that she and I have right now will never change, but I am fully aware that "Gilmore Girls" is just a television show and that not all mother and daughters remain best friends for their entire lives. I can tell you that my other best friend is my mother, so I do hold out hope! Yep, one best friend 30 years younger than me, and one 30 years older. But I wouldn't have it any other way. Don't get me wrong... I have friends my own age! But I have discovered that my family is my life. That is one of the many things my daughter has made easier for me to see. Yes, I am a bit nostalgic right now as Reagan has turned two. I think that she can sense that she is growing up too fast and wants to hold onto being my baby as long as she can as well. She has been a lot more cuddly the past few days, which I have thoroughly enjoyed. Every hug, every kiss, every back rub, every arm pat, every smile are all tucked safely away into the corners of my heart so that my heart is full. I feel so thankful and blessed to have Reagan. It sounds so simple to say, but the feelings are stronger than I ever knew possible... I love my daughter.

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